Creepy Crawlies

It’s raining - absolutely horrible out there. The ground is sodden and claggy and all I can hear is rain rain rain, lashing against the windows.

There’s not a lot I can do outside.

So I decide to clean the daughter’s bedroom instead. I put on my gas mask, radiation suit and rubber gloves and, clutching a large bottle of disinfectant, I venture into the hovel.

It’s not as bad as I feared. And so I decide to tackle under the bed.

Well I pull out the usual assortment of knickers and socks, mouldy apple cores, crisp packets and sweet wrappers.

Then I pull out two small Tupperware boxes. I wondered where those had gone. I’m not too sure about that brown semi-liquid stuff that’s slopping about inside them though. Good job they’re sealed. I put them to one side to deal with later.

And then I spot the box.

Odd.

The lid is askew and I can see some shrivelled up leaves and a few twigs in it. As I pull it towards me I notice… the airholes.

Airholes?

I make a hasty retreat.

Exactly WHAT is loose in my daughter’s bedroom?

Hosepipes and Water Meters

I've come home from work early - a trip to the vets needed to remove a tick from the guinea pig's ear. So while the kids are loading him into a box I stroll down to check on my patch of dirt.

"Strange," I think as I approach it. "Someone's watering it."

Then it dawns on me. The kids are behind me in the guinea- pig run. That's the hosepipe! Someone has left it on and the hose has split with the heat and the pressure and there's water spraying everywhere!

A mad sprint up the garden to turn off the tap and I return to survey the damage. The ground is soaking. Fortunately most of the water has gone onto my veg and my squash and sweetcorn are looking very happy.

But that's not the point.

We're on a water meter.

And I'm not looking forward to getting my next water bill.

The guinea pig's fine though and here he is, back in his run, minus tick :-)